How to deal with gambling addiction. How to get rid of gambling in the machine: Tips for a psychologist. Video curse gamersanov

As with the treatment of other dependencies, the treatment of gaming is based on the twelve-step program. Treatment begins with a decision on complete abstinence. Let's analyze with you interesting information that drives players who were addicted to slot machines.

Best video:

How to start throwing gambling slot machines

If you do not know where treatment begins from dependence on gambling gaming machines, then the point is disclosed in our article. The most difficult is the beginning of the end. You can start with group therapy. You must meet face to face with other people who are also dependent on the game of gambling. Start talking about yourself, about your compulsive behavior. You must recognize your defeat. Admit refusal, for the player it will be the hardest problem. You can argue with you, saying "I bet you cope with, and all this is not difficult." Recall that you had before you started to fight game addiction.

Phases of gambling, they are only 4:
1. Phase winnings,
2. Phase loss,
3. Phase despair,
4. Phase "hopeless".

At the very beginning, the game go randomly. Have fun people who have extra money.
Often the winnings are, because of this, "the appetite grows." This is the stage of victory. Big victories cause more and more strong excitement, a person begins to make rates increasingly and above. Already then, he begins to believe that it will always be in winnings, and also that there will be a "big win."

Treatment of gaming and gambling machines, like any other dependence, begins with a decision on complete abstinence. Any game should be excluded from life. This concerns even harmless tennis. In addition, abstinence also means non-participation in the game even as an observer. You can not watch sports channels and television shows, in which the theme of excitement is present. Gamblers also recommends staying away from alcohol. It is necessary to prevent recurrence.

How to get rid of dependence on gambling machines with psychology

Not every person normally copes with the last stage. Indeed, at the last phase, the playman can simply endorse the life of suicide. Therefore, the gamers should make a choice. Some people choose treatment. And it is clear that it is not easy that it also costs money. But you can always go back to the starting point. It is only necessary to find motivation in yourself.

Addiction to gambling can be called drug addiction. This affects the psychological state of a person. The treatment of dependence on gambling is based on very similar principles, as the treatment of other dependencies. Twelve steps - such treatment is considered effective. Within this program you can help both large players and small. Read the link "Twelve steps of self-treatment."

If the article "How to deal with the addiction from gambling" was useful to you, feel free to share the link. Perhaps this simple decision you will save someone's life.

Together with the Psychotherapist, the Moscow clinic Rehab Family and a specialist in the treatment of gambling Roman Gerasimov "Rating bookmakers" traced the path of the game in the sports bets - from the formation of dependence to appeal to the doctor, rehabilitation. We learned who is more susceptible to gambling, how to identify it, as it is treated and how big the chances of getting rid of.

How the game turns into a disease

For people suffering from nervous, mental illness, the negation of the problem. "Well, yes, I drink several times a week, but I can stop, what kind of alcoholism is!", "Say any alcoholic. "Yes, I bet for many years, constantly in a decent minus, but I'm just not lucky, it will soon change everything," says all kinds of the game. But, alas, addiction is what a person cannot take and just refuse, no matter how simple it seemed to him.

"Game is a serious illness," Roman Gerasimov explains. - And as any other disease, she has different stages. For help, as a rule, they are treated or they are given, people who have suffered serious losses because of gambling. This can be said, the main "symptom" - loss. Losses of financial, social status, personal relationships - most often due to debts. Because of this, friends are lost. There may be problems with the law against the background of unpaid loans, people can apply even to criminal structures in search of money. All this understands and see, but can not stop. This is a sign of dependence on games - they are not able to stop without assistance.

Each person has its own bottom, reaching which, he can independently come to the clinic. Someone is aware of how much dropped, waging in loved ones. And someone and being alone under the fence, with death, looking for ways to play. Usually, the dependent person until the latter denies its problem, the presence of gamerity. After all, if he admits it, he should stop playing. And the denial allows him to continue, explaining this by different motives - I just had a black strip, so lucky I was lucky, I just did not gain experience.

- these patients most often lead to a psychotherapist close or they come under pressure from their relatives, "says psychotherapist. - But the gamers themselves come, it is also not uncommon. Come, if you know where to go. In my practice there is a characteristic example. When more gambling in Russia was not prohibited and did not regulate, up to 80% of the rehabilitation of the rehabilitation of igmanov fell towards us through business cards that were distributed in the game halls, casinos. This is a very important psychological moment: in gambling establishments, losing, a person is aware that it is impossible. In a day or two, he will again be covered by the game, but if in this moment, so to speak, insight, he will have information before his eyes, he can seek help. And this is a real chance to get out of this situation for him.

Games from the world of sports rates

Are there some features of the gamers who are unable to interrupt their game in sports rates? According to the specialist, often the game dependence is mixed. And betting lovers distinguishes faith in the analysis factor, and not blind luck. Although in fact, they are far from the analysis.

- In my practice there were enough patients who played in the bookmakers, "says Roman Gerasimov. - And more often, the game was mixed, that is, the man attracted any gambling money - bets, automata, casino, poker, and even the stock game refers to this category. The feature of those players who make bets in their attitude to themselves. They consider themselves good analysts, do certain intellectual work. In general, do not believe that they are relying only for good luck, and believe that it all depends exclusively from them. Indeed, there are people who act emotionally, they only rely on the calculation, they are interested in rates or stock game as a form of earnings. They should more often win or at least about equal proportions to win and lose.

So, if a person is constantly losing more in money, but at the same time does not limit himself, but continues and even raises the rates, then there is no analytics and calculation for it, this is already a manifestation of gaming. And the player from the analyst is distinguished by the fact that he is not interested in what he would not have inspired it.

- His "Drug", if you can put it so, is an excitement, excitement from the game itself, splashes of a high level of emotional state, both positive and negative. Euphoria Victory, despair of defeat - the player wants to feel them constantly, and it pulls him to put it again and again. Professional players earn their game, so there is no place for emotions in their actions, only the calculation. Games are the same, even if they are well versed in the rates, will act on emotions and illogical, because it makes it feel more excitement, the fear of playing and the desire to win. The point of no return here is when the game of pleasure turns into a problem that makes losing more and more money.

But very few can feel this moment. Because, even having lost the pleasure of the process, they see the prospect of obtaining it in the future. Therefore, dependent people are very difficult to follow the slogan.

Portrait of igromechan

Who most often suffers from gambling? Psychological image is clear: it is characteristic of the dependent type of personality. And for this type, the dependence form does not have a decisive value.

- Just in the life path, the bookmakers, a casino or machine guns, and could be caught in alcohol, for example. Or, even more often, it depends on alcohol too, "says psychotherapist. - Games are a rather wide social contingent. If we talk about personal experience, then most often we are talking about the middle class or just below. These are not alone people - most often family, with children. They have a certain dissatisfaction with their social status or the situation in the family, there is a desire to feel significant. A person thinks - I am a Torva Kush and will provide all my family. Such a "delicious" version of the freebies, especially since the examples before the eyes, when a person put a little, won a lot and became a hero. But in fact, I described only one characteristic portrait of a dozen. There are many other examples - other motivation, other social status. The portrait of the game is definitely not a narrow portrait.

The main "symptom" of gambling - the loss of financial, social status, personal relationships - most often due to debts

Treat from the game

The first rule of treatment of gaming is the recognition of the patient of its dependence. As soon as he realizes it and completely refuses the game, he will fall on the way of recovery. It is clear that it is not easy. And the abstinence from the game is required, and not temporary, but complete.

- Golden dream of any dependent is to control the process of consumption, substances, drink, games. But the truth is that it is impossible, "Roman Gerasimov insists. - You can not teach the game of a responsible game. As soon as he starts to put again, he will fall on the way to the inevitable breakdown. This is an illusion that he will be able to stop this time.

The rehabilitation programs of igmanov are different.

- Our, for example, were outpatient, that is, without premises to the clinic for all the time of treatment. People came to classes. Group therapy is very important here, so that the player understands that he is not alone in his problem, he saw that it approaches everyone. Conducted, of course, individual psychological sessions are given a certain work on the home for self-analysis. People get acquainted with the peculiarities of the disease, their behavior, learn how they are deceiving themselves, begin to understand the true cause of their game. All after all, players think they are playing to win money. But in fact, in this way, they fill out an emotional vacuum, they receive the life of life, which they lack.

It does not matter, a poor man or rich, among the rich problems that are not related to social and financial insecurity, he is much than dissatisfied in life, and the game becomes a surrogate of emotions. Therefore, it is very important that a person began to realize it. And as soon as he learns to refrain, keep the game "sobriety", it is necessary to teach it otherwise to fill this vacuum, develop it as a person. So that there is no shortage of ordinary human emotions.

How many are able to cure from addiction, quit to lose money once and forever? The percentage of Roman Gerasimov rolled from the gaming dependence tells on the basis of the rehabilitation program in which he was directly involved as a specialist. It safely passed about 40% of patients.

- Of these, approximately half of them managed to completely get rid of dependence, maintain "sobriety". And the other 20% still broke out and began to play again, some of them later came to us on the program. Well, the majority, 60%, or broke off in the process of passing rehabilitation, or simply came out of the program in their will. In principle, the percentage of healing from gymnia comparable to other forms of dependence, since the nature of them is similar. According to some kind of parameters, games are easier, by some and heavier. For example, drug addicts can be in the system of use and 5, and 7, and 10 years. And the playman can play everything and literally to burn. But, of course, this is not necessary, every case of dependence is a special case that you need to do individually, although following the general principles of treatment.

Stories not one gameman

In Europe, they have already appeared for quite some time, the so-called clubs of anonymous players are gaining popularity and in Russia (by analogy with the societies of anonymous alcoholics). These are Internet projects, and offline community, where people with gaming addiction can meet, talk, tell about their problems, ask for help and support. The same group therapy, which says Roman Gerasimov. "The rating of bookmakers" studied dozens of stories of gaming rates for sports and chose several indicative.

Gambling of one of the family members - trouble for all relatives

"Sweet again ..."

"I am 35 years old. Married for the second time, son 5 years. The first time I got acquainted with the slot machine in the distant 2000 year: everything was simple - put X rubles - received XX rubles. And then it started: everything that I worked, "everything worked into the pavilions with slot machines, tried to return what he lost. The occasion was the winnings, but in general, by and large, everything lost. The first wife began to understand that the family budget goes aside, - confessed in his trouble, decided to cope with it together. But in any case, I tried to play a deception, I did it ... As a result - a lot of overdue loans, problems with my wife, hut in the rental - here too, the friends, the friends were noticed - many friends lost ... In short, everything is bad: life has changed and turned into a solid game . With his wife divorced - by and large, because of the excitement. I decided to start a new life, promised himself to tie with casino and slot machines. Found a new job, a girl. A year later, the son was born, everything is fine, work, family. There are no games - it came to me that with a computer still in a plus you will not be, I realized that this topic is closed for me. In addition, in Russia at that time, the reform of the game business - the casino was closed, or rather, almost everything, but these questions were no longer interested. New Life, Money, New Machine, Apartment, Travel ... Friends - Everything is fine. And here - bets on the sport. By chance. Again hooked. And it suffered - debts, loans, problems with his wife, friends, relatives. Now we are on the verge of divorce - although I have long been your business, and I earn more than an office employee, once in 7-10. And everything goes to the bookmakers. I sold a good car for a long time, I go on an old "Honda", and she laid in the pawnshop ... stranded with friends, no one will ever give money into debt. In general, I am desperate. In a good way - stop - not to play the month of another - the debts will not. I really want this and now I give a promise to all of you, that I will not put anymore. Every day I will report, go to my senses, to work, I take my chefty myself. "

"Yes," MJ "- it will make these candidates for the first league in any case ..."

"I did the first bets according to the principle: yes," Manchester United "- it will bring these candidates for the first league anyway, everything is obvious, and why take it on this bet? Later, no less than the idiotic principle: I will put it on the TM on the 87th minute, well, who will already be scored here with a 2-0 score, and why the main thing? You know, beginners really lucky. Still, truth, fools. But on such logic to me, a fool, who is not able to stop, just should take. Only FIG lay there, but this later. So, such idiotic bets were brought me even at some point if not in plus, then to almost full waged earlier in the lotto. But where to stop there. "Catch up and run", "will perform a five-year plan for 4 years" ... Beautiful slogans to describe the style of my game then, and now in many respects. A series of idiotic rates that for some reason stopped massively passing. Even greater plums. But the mind enough did not merge all the accumulations. Oh, yes, I completely forgot. At some point, Mom suddenly decided to support my goal of accumulation on one's own housing, and even almost always gave some kind of solid part with his little salary. With a report on the total amount of current savings in an arbitrary moment of time, of course. Plus, I myself earned something on the Internet. In itself, the amount has grown steadily, if you throw a loss from the life. And then began "stability". Reliable rates, of course. Stable game every 2-3 weeks, and stable plums of solid sums every 2-3 months. So lasted for more than 2 years. Money still continued to be copied, and even managed to somehow imperceptibly go to scheduled amounts. As a result, the amount on a microscopic studio apartment at the stage of pit somewhere in a pure field behind the Moscow Ring Road. Let such a pair, but still an apartment. But came February this year. It would seem that another planned drain, given that the latter was in early December. Yes, only now he is in real game binge. I do not want to climb into a detailed chronology of this viscous swamp, but the idea is that at the moment my lambed virtual apartment has already turned out to be in a single-class foreign car. I especially want to note the fact that mom eventually had to admit. First, in early June, the minus is not yet such an enchanting amount. And the second time - just a week ago, at that time on the full program. Why at that time? Yes, because I still managed to merge literally just. The reaction of the mother is some extent shock, plus a complete refusal of making further contributions to my "capital". What else drives me to hopelessness. That money was added, and now the sharply diminished, so also froze at the dead point. Loaded doubly if you can put it. But they already do not care if it were for sure that no bet in my life I would no longer. So at least the light is visible away. True, every day I think this option is increasingly realistic, because the swamp is sucking. Plus stories in which they are harvested from this swamp, at best, one of the pair of hundreds. You know, I have already lost faith in my uniqueness ... And yes, I especially want to mention my life. More precisely, her shameful, first of all for itself, content. No interests, no joys, absolute zero motivation in everything. Why there, even the girls were never in life in life. The house is a university -computer, and that's it. And now to the banal. How do you still get out of this swamp? How to stop doing bets and fill your life with something bright and in sufficient quantity? ".

"Lost money for a child"

"I am a player with an experience in 14 years. I have 5-6 loans, I do not remember exactly how much. In one of the 8 thousand grew up 400. I tried to quit. Lyond the rehabilitation, but could not stand and escaped from psychologists. Yesterday they took another loan with her friend, she took on himself, and everything was blown up, there was a fire in the club, and we barely got out of there. I think this is already exactly the sign: if I continue to the end. I want to say that whatever theories we would build (how to win) - the end of the same one. Yesterday I lost money for a child for a birthday, today I feel froned at all. I do not play for 12 hours - this is already achieving for me. I think you need to go to anonymous players again. Because after the assembly traction still leaves. "

"It seemed I can throw at any time."

"Losing money in bookmakers for 5 years, the last 2 years have been particularly unprofitable: about 1 million or more. Now I got on credit 400 thousand. The whole salary goes on the bet. The most interesting thing that I always seemed to me, and now sometimes it seems that I can throw at any moment, although in fact it is not. Near and relatives do not know. A spoon of honey is that for 6 months I will pay with debts, if you hardly save and no longer put. There were small breaks for a couple of months, why began again? I can not find an explanation .... Mood after lost rates below zero. Full depression, and this is reflected in others. And the absolute opposite of the won: Euphoria, it seems that you can do everything in this life. I never understood the drug addicts and alcoholics, and in fact, in fact, I myself worse on the order. "

Hello, Yana!

Like many readers of your LJ, I want to express your gratitude to you for the fact that you have :)) You are always interested, beautiful, informative and with a soul. Hope it will last forever! :))

Always read the heading "Question-answer" and wonder how you find the necessary words and non-standard solutions for human problems. In my case, it is hardly possible to find a non-standard solution, but I would definitely not prevent several encouraging words now.

It so happened that I have not lived for several years in that country, where he was born, and where he moved to her husband. Here I am surrounded by many good people, but few of them I want to burden my problem, and there is no so strong intimacy so that you can do it. The remaining friends and relatives also do not know that I have been going on, in a small exception.

My problem, in fact, is that my wonderful husband in many respects is not at all exactly what everyone is imagined. Everyone thinks that he is a kind, open guy, a merry and soul of the company, not quite lucky, sometimes infantile, but overall a dear man. In fact, he completely swallowed the devil of Gaming. He plays a casino and, as I begin to understand now, it is unlikely to break this situation. It turned out about six months ago and was accompanied by his impressive repentance and my hope that now everything will change. Together with repentance, it turned out the mass of unpleasant details about his perverted lies, which he was engaged in all the time of our relationship. The great number of incredible stories involved with him and led to the loss of another major amount of money was told by me from his words to many of my friends (like, imagine how we are not lucky!), That is why I don't really want to now enter them into a real course. business Because under these stories, they helped me, lent money, supported as they could.

By the way, until I collided personally with such a situation, it would not believe in life that people are able to invent such detailed and reliable stories that cover them in vicious and in some places. But it exists, so people, be alert. I can't live without trust, so after his repentance after a while I forgave him and began to trust money again, not to recheck His words, etc. And today I learned that he continues to play and we have a lot of debts again. I write "with us," because how else? We have a common budget, we have shared bills for payment and a general refrigerator. Recently, my incomes were more and he again with all the truths and untrue (mostly last) pulled out money from me.

And if last time I had some kind of hope that he really formed that everyone would make mistakes, but together it would overcome and blah blah blah ... then now I absolutely see that a person sick and does not own that its moral norms are already too distorted. At the same time, in our small country, psychologists can hardly exist, who can help him (although I will still answer it to a psychologist). Therefore, the whole day in my head pulses only one question - what should I do? How to live with a person who can never trust who can substitute the closest people (there are a couple of examples), who is not able or does not want to overcome his dependence, although it understands that she completely kills his beautiful life?

At the same time parting with him because of this in my mind is equivalent to how to part with a person who fell ill. Oh, are you seriously sick? Sorry, we are not on the way! No, I can't, we have long been together and I love it. What can be done for him, in addition to helping psychologists?

Sorry that there are so many questions, and the text is so configured - I am still impressed.

Thank you in advance for your participation. Even for what it is read.

Hello!

Because I saw such a close, I have the very first advice: any truth and inconsistencies to block access to money! When such people overlap oxygen, they begin to try to get to any resources, the most uncomfortable methods and through the coocher the short time go through all the means that you can come up with!
The second is to get around / calling all relatives, tell them that there is such a problem, and ask for any pretext not to give money.

The fact is that all other problems can then be solved by common efforts, or not to decide - this is a very long story. But first, you need to try to resist the fusion of all available money, it happens wildly and irrevocably!

In our circle of friends was such a case - so there, when problems began, the patient first promised and swore that he went to be treated, everything stopped and keeping himself in his hands. Then he managed to correct distant relatives) who lived in Russia. While part of the family and he were in Germany), and some unthinkable ways persuaded them to sell the apartment and send him all the money, supposedly under the reliable business they open with his wife. (These were the relatives of the wife, and he managed to turn everything so much that they did it, never talking to his wife himself). As you probably already guessed, relatives were left without an apartment, it's never enough for a new one, the money is lost in a short time, he will never earn so much. There, the elderly, as a result, live in the country, they believed him that he would lead to the end of the summer and send all the money back. with big percentages. It was a few years ago.

I mean that these stunning rolling abilities will be powered in all instances to get all the money that can be mined.

Unfortunately, the following cases are such people going to lend money in completely dark places. And from these dark places, bandits begin to come, and threaten wives and children, and other family members, because their husband / son must have very large amounts. And it is usually this is the moment when wives from her husbands leave, no longer because they are all tired or something, but because they are scary for themselves and children. Knowing that it can develop in this direction, you can try to keep my husband in advance at least such nonsense does not do - but whether he will hear appeals - a big question.

I also worked for a while in Berlin in a casino, so I pretty well represent a clientele that is found there. And these stories hid. I do not know how you. But we may have in difficult cases to bypass all the nearest casinos, and to simplify the owners to ban this person to enter there. If anyone has everything from under control, and the relatives and crying wives are beginning to walk on casino, they usually do it. They just go to meet these tragedies to remove away from their business. It is clear to them that in this stage, a person is already ruined, or close to that maybe he will bring there one or another thousand. But in essence it is already a matter of time when there will be more troubles than good. Therefore, they are calmly enter the blacklist.
The next step is to apply to the court, and ask the judge to decide the same thing - a ban on a person on the entrance in all relevant institutions, because it is inadequate, and does not know. What fills. But, as already mentioned, I do not know if you have it.

I also say that I heard such stories a couple of times, and they all ended when the family completely overlap to such a person access to money. That's just basically, and as a small, open text, because he can not be trusted. Common refrigerator - yes. Money - not to give at all. What he earns himself, apparently it cannot be saved, this is his bill and his money. What your, needs to be removed and saved by any ways. Experience has shown that all funds go through such families, so sometimes there are literally cards to give to relatives who do not live with you, sometimes shooting only a little money, how much money is needed, and do not keep any means to which a person Could get there. No checks, cards, savings recordings, do not keep anything in the cabinets at home, where it climbs when there is no one at home. A negotiated with relatives and loved ones, to remove away, so that nothing can be reached, without asking for someone familiar, or two-three. Many are very afraid to do this. Because they are afraid to offend, or afraid of the scandal. But it is necessary to understand that if it is not done, the most open text, it will simply fly into the pipe all the money - it will not stop anything until everything breaks there! And then you will scroll that they didn't cover all the shops before, trying to avoid open conflict.

If the process already really went, and a person cannot stop, (and judging by the description is it) - all the same, all the most unpleasant scenarios will already take place, this is a matter of time. And all the disassembly, scandals, resentment, reproaches, all-all that can be said about this - all this is already provided to you. You can directly sit down and morally prepared for this all respond. Such a person does not control himself, and he never subscribes under it. Appropriate will be rebuilding with you until you stop, resist, offended, manipulate. put on your feeling of guilt, then on pity, then it will pretend what you believed. I agree with everything, and cooperates, and much more. And at the same time nichrome does not cooperate, and bend the owl line

Good news: Some of these people stop when they completely overlap all the money. They, in fact, behave like drug addicts (they are drug addicts). But they still do not have breakdowns like people sitting on different substances. Therefore, when they are completely put in a dead end, start to endure things out of the house, sell them, and lose the reversed - they are missing them. Those. This is "too", and then they stop.

Unfortunately, not all.

Many people turn to this ugly phase. As a result, their understandable thing is thrown, because they begin to just break their own women and children.

Others still pass the dual rating phase in bad places. And stop after big trouble, constantly frightened. However, it also works only if you leave them with this problem alone. If in such a southernims of the wife-mother-relatives throw off to give his debts to gangs - rest confident, in a month, the gangsters will come again, because He (seeing that the end of the world did not come) went and did the same once again.

Those. All resources of other people will go there until they are allocated to allocate them. The stop can occur only if they are all run away, and he exhausted all his own. And he will bring himself to that handle, then whom he himself is too scary.

P.S. I do not know what country you are, but in many countries there are psychologists (or or rather, a psychiatrist is already needed here) that are treated. But for this it is necessary that the person go to treat himself. Ignition, as far as I know, can be treated only by the will of the patient.

P.P.S. Leaving a person with severe addiction - it is necessary if the joint life becomes short. And this is elementary self-preservation. Stay with a drug addict from a sense of debt, from a sense of guilt, pity, or for some other reason - nonsense. Anyway, if he rolls off the slide, then this is only a matter of time when he traveled to such a dead end, which will end the same - you will run away from it. If you can not control the situation, run away until it burns all your resources, and did not hang more debts on you. And see how you would not be in a situation. When you give his debts for 30 years. This is exactly no relationship! No one should do this for anyone! And you should not! This you must try to avoid.

P.p.p.s. If you can't trust a person at all, you still break down the relationship. If something is possible between such people, then only after the complete "zeroing" is when they ran away, he all began first, for a long time argued and showed everyone) for many years!) That everything really ended and he fixed everything. If at all, then only very soon and after serious changes. And if someone generally manage to jump from that, then only after (and as a result) that all relatives and relatives cease to finance it.

I really sympathize, and I wish to escape from this horror with the least losses! "To make a man formed and stopped" I wish you too, but rather rhetorically. Because (Sorry) I do not believe in it. Those. I believe that this is possible, but only after full collapse. And without complete immersion on the bottom - I believe in probability of about 0.01%.

He is "an unlucky adventurer, a resident of a metropolis, unfortunate in family life, dissatisfied with professional and social status, he is 18-45 years old, it is subject to the influence of other people, abides in the world of illusions, and sprinkles frequent and sharp mood swings, with Kandanen, prefers A conflict way to clarify relationships is inclined to impulsive actions "and so on. This portrait of the Nahtharians wrote off the game, describing the typical features of who burns their lives on automata.

The problem becomes every day more serious and more common, families are looking for an answer to the question, how to help you have a close person? Letters with cries of despair are increasingly coming to the editor: , , . The letter served to the final impetus for the compilation of this material was posted on the Orthodox Forum.

"People! Dear Orthodox! Help, I ask you ... My husband dies, my family dies, and I also die ... I do not know how to overpower evil that entered our life.
My husband is a playground with 20 years. He is sick - truly ill.
We got married two years ago by great love, I now do not doubt - on the real one. And he has And I have had an unsuccessful experience before that (I have one marriage, he has two). But our feeling we were both perceived as God's gift. Before the wedding, he told me about his dependence - because of her he had already suffered a widow: Lost an apartment, a business, because of the theft and irrevocable debts, even sat in prison. Without making it, got sick and left of life his mother. Meeting with me, Mikhail perceived as a sign and hope for a new life. He even decided to be baptized before the wedding, and then we married. However, almost before the wedding itself he had a breakdown - he went to the casino and lost everything that was. I, of course, was shocked because before I never came across such a phenomenon as a game dependence . N about he swore, that this is the last time. Well, I believed .
Unfortunately, hopes were not justified. During these two years, breakdowns happened with periodicity once every 2 months. It was a nightmare. He lost his salary, he took a debt and lost again, cradle with me ... He lost several places of work. We lived on my salary - which was not easy, because it was necessary to pay for a removable apartment, paying his previous debts on the suit. ...
It was all - and tears, and anger, looking for him in the night ... Trying to find a solution, we tried a lot. He actually wants to cure L. . P on your illness and would like to save L. from her. We have a hospital specializing in dependencies, but we need money for treatment that is not. Yes, it is not particularly and believed that it will help.
It is obvious to me one thing - only God can help him and he himself. Just believing truly, he will be able to stop. But in this and the snag. See you with me, Mikhail was an unbeliest man. And during this time, I hope, began to make some steps. And even after the next breakdown, he spent 3 weeks in the male monastery in the wakes (we live in Minsk). He arrived from there with burning eyes, we began to pray in the morning and in the evening, more often to be in the temple. I got acquainted with the wonderful priests who helped the tips ..
But ... I recently disrupted, again losing everything, again the loss of the chance to get a job. And - his recognition is that he played much more often - even when he brought some money, she still went to the casino. And the worst thing - his words that there is no true faith in him, and even in the monastery he was in the monastery, and the church life is not for him ... He, like many men, is trying to comprehend God's mind. And he himself admits that he needs a miracle. I do not believe that it is serious. These are all the misties of the enemy of the human race. But how to defeat his influence?!
I recently realized that, probably, I play his sin's hand, being close to my husband. After all, he always knows that I will forgive him, he will have shelter, food and that I will even pay on his debts .... And if I have in my wallet you can take money on the game! That's what the worst ... And I asked him to leave, took the keys. But now I can not find myself places - torment where he is and what with him. After all, one will die ...
All who even knows a little about our situation, have long been telling me so that I leave him and lived my life, it's not too late. But how to do it, if I love it. He is my half, my wedded husband, and without him there is no life. I pray for him every day at home, I go to the temple and I also ask him to give him anything, forces ...
Help! Anyone, maybe tell me what to do ... stay with him, carry him as his cross, or to step aside so that he finally realized the whole horror of his position ...
At least pray for us, for Olga and Mikhail ... "

We asked to comment on the letter of Olga Clear Temple Icons of the Kazan Mother of God on the Red Square of the Priest Igor Fomin:

Never play for someone else's rules

Unfortunately, this situation is standard, meets now very often.

I would like to immediately start with the last lines of the letter. Olga asks the council - what to do next. I did not understand from the letter - whether the children are in the family - they, of course, play a big role in making a decision, but we will think that there are no children, since she did not speak about them. Olga's husband loves, trying his love to move into business: less often playing and less frequently spend money, falling into this addiction, givey to her. I think that Olga needs to stay if there are no children. If there are children, this is a question of purely personal and, I think, not very correctly solve it on the pages of the Internet,.

What can I say about Mikhail? His dependence is terrible. In Soviet times, we knew that drunkenness, alcoholism - terrible sins, vices, that smoking is the same drug. Then the restructuring came, and we learned that it turns out, there are also addiction with a set of different drugs: heroin, pills, and so on. With an active and rapid arrival in our life of democracy, we learned that there are even more terrible things - slot machines or, as they are also called, one-handed gangsters. As a priest, I had to deal with many terrible consequences of this dependence. Someone forgotten from personal grief, thanks to the game, someone - and this is a more frequent case - had an excitement - I wanted to be alone, and he spent time with a slot machine. All became dependent on these one-armed bandits.

What happens to a person when he sits on the machine? They are managed by a passion, discontent leads it, and most importantly - distrust of God's fishery. When a person does not trust the material state in which he abides, and he hopes to change it in seconds without difficulty. Often it is that the search for material enrichment seats people for the machine: they want to win or play some debt.

Gambling is a terrible passion. When a person falls into dependence, he begins to pursue the thirst for enrichment and profit. What happens next? Very often he takes money that he stole from his wife or received from the sale of an apartment in which his children live, borrowed. Anyone has a conscience. Someone has more speaking, someone has less, and a person understands what is deprived of something. At first, the player seeks to play the money, but then the excitement turns on, the player does not bring excitement to good, forgets what the Lord spoke about: "In the sweat of his face, you will get your bread." The person, for the sake of fast profit, for the sake of the ephemeral material good or in order to satisfy his momentary aspirations, desires, passion, in order to say: "I won. I'm on top of ", loses myself, falls into dependence.

Suppose someone starts to lead in the family, I want to be first. Such a family will not stand for a long time, or rather, it can resist, but only if the second half turns out to be wise. But terrible tents, terrible times, humiliation of another will have to undergo. So in this situation, I would like to wish the poor Olga if she loves her husband, and love is always a victim, to remain wise. And, if the husband is not aggressive, especially since there are glimpses and hope that he ever stops, then it is necessary to stay. This is really a real disease and the husband is really very sick.

This disease is very difficult to cure. Maybe you should lead the player to another channel? After all, how to treat drug addicts? First, alcoholics make them, then treat from alcoholism. Maybe here too, there must be some kind of person in another area, interest, excitement, to interest him with some kind of creative matter, because excitement, not related to money, can be sent to a positive channel. As a priest, I can advise the beautiful remedy, the best medicine is love.

I had a very interesting case at parish, unpropered. One married couple lived together five years. Then the husband began to drink: a lot - a little, but fifteen drank every day. When I myself came out when he was brought when he was attacked. Every day he drank and had complete innovation. Children grew up, and the wife never said for all this time that he drinks, never raised his scandal, as if she did not notice that he was drinking. He psychoed because of this, nervous, said that she did not like him if he was silent, it would have rolled the scandal, I would give a rolling pin on my head, I would have broken a bottle so much. She says: "What do I feel drunk with him, he will not understand anything himself. And in the morning it is a pity becoming. " And what happened? He took and threw to drink because his wife, let's say so humbly endured, demolished. He understood everything. For several years now I do not drink. This example is atypical, but it perfectly shows how love you can change something in a person's life. Every spouse can see how to help. Yes, sometimes it is necessary to pour cold water, cut off. And even when you're already with a rolling on your husband, you are, and this is very important, near. It is really important. The child fell ill, we do everything: at night we get up, the temperature is measuring, we carry on the handles, we run on the pharmacy at night. And here the beloved person fell ill. It will take another time, and he will understand what hurts, he will see the eyes of suffering. When he will finally see what hurts, he will be faster that way that saves from it.

— Batyushka, and will not indulge the sin of her husband a joint life with him?

"If we now painted a life for every half an hour for the next 10 years, then it would be potakali." But, since the wife is still living and the husband is alive, it is impossible to say about the indulgence. It is necessary to pray to my wife, she must ask the Lord about help, you have to be close to my husband, so that at the moment he will take the eyes, looking at the machine, she would lead him to the cinema, for example, to wait. Yes, just to be beside him so that he does not escape anywhere. There are moments that a person else, close, will surely feel and see. She reacts at the right moment and tell him: "Never, let's go from here." After all, the dependent person is a complete bravery, such a "ram" must be left aside. True, of course, if there is aggression, it may be scary, the husband may be angry and even crumpled ...

- How to behave at that moment when you see that the husband specifically climbs the quarrel and annoges, only to imagine the moment and run to play?

- Wisdom to turn on and meekness. Every woman possesses it. We need to undergo. The wife sees that aggression is directed not to her. He specially spent a quarrel to get out of the house. Where is our wisdom of Christian, where are our patience?

Remember, Christ sent the apostles for the sermon, and said: "In which house you go, there and stay. But if you are not going there, then go out, and even the dust fuck off your feet. This is evidence that the apostles are calmly, so that there is no irritation.

For example, you are annoyed and people turn to you with open hearts. Of course, you cut a little. There is such a law: "Never play for someone else's rules." Do not go to: You will always lose. It is necessary differently, you need to play in another bed. Then everything will turn out. It is necessary to make a conversation in a different way. Then there will be no irritation.

- Batyushka, and if the player came to confession with repentance. So that you say, knowing that he will come out now and can go "there" again?

- If the player comes with repentance, then, of course, I would have rejoiced with him. I am not angry, and I do not know, he will go to play or not. I would have experienced for him. You should pray for him. If he went to play, I would take it again. It would be necessary to go with him - I would go with him. Before the right place went to be ashamed. I do not think that he would go to the casino. I had this case when the addict came to repentance and asked me to come to the house with him. He himself realized that I was dependent: "I am now sure to find someone," he said - they see each other's drug addicts from afar. We walked with him, everything was fine, I brought him home, I passed my parents. If you can not help you effectively, then just listen to a person, and sometimes enough.

- Is it possible to send a passion for the game to another direction, for benefit?

- Can. Even need. Any sin of counterweight is virtue. Worn after all does not sit - he always comes up with passion. Here is one very essential thing - the player should want to be corrected. If this desire is, everything else can be done. Wishes will not, there will be no fear before that - nothing will work. God forbid, to be able to sustain our fear of the game ...

- Father Igor, and whether it is possible to say that some people are more susceptible to gaming addiction?

- It seems to me that emotional people are more susceptible, and those who want to throw out their emotions that are waiting for some sharp sensations. I think that those who have very measured work are subject to: nothing happens at work. Here he is sitting in front of the monitor, he does not beat him on his head, everything is very quiet and calmly, and the adrenaline ejection is needed. In a word, from a physiological point of view, those whose dependence of this in life is missing. And from the spiritual point of view, those who do not want to work on the Niba Christ are subject to.

We somehow went to the New-Afonov Monastery with my daughter and considered paintings. A terrible court, Geenna, people with distorted persons, are drawn on the western wall.

- Who is it? - asks daughter.

- Those who did not want to be friends with God, communicate, talk. Those who fought against God. Who has not specifically noticed him. Who did not recognize him, - I reply.

She listens carefully.

- A-ah, these are those who only wanted a miracle!

- Yes, these are people who lack a miracle. Those who do not want to work to work on Nibi.

- How much of this disease is prone to a believer, fasting? A number of psychologists claim that a Christian cannot go into gambling addiction.

- You know, I, in general, agrees with psychologists that a believer is quite querciling, there is a certain set of rules that are brought up spiritually. It has the power of will. He does not only have forces, not only will there be, but also the power of will, which allows him to stop at some point not only with slot machines, but also in any situation in everyday life. For example, the post is a training. Warrior must fight every day, and just as a Christian, he tempts himself to confront sin.

The game is a clear sin who grabs your soul. You paid attention that there, where there are slot machines in serious institutions - there are no windows there that people do not see the white light, everything should be artificial, and light too. People should not see how the day and night change. This such little trick, which is not paying attention, but in fact a very interesting point. A person cannot control himself, no miracle of God can rely on, cut off. A believer is less exposed to this dependence due to the fact that it is trained.

Prayer in grief and illness SVT. Dimitri Rostovsky

Save, Lord, and the surviving the slave of your (name) with the words of the Divine Gospel of yours, readable on the salvation of your slave (name), fell, Lord, the thief of all his sins, and yes the grace of yours, which purifies, sanctifying any person in The name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.

About getting rid of temptations

(Rev. Simeon of the New Theologian)
Do not back on me, Vladyko, Lord, temptation, or grief, or a disease over my strength, but get rid of them or give me a fortress to transfer them to gratitude.

Cry (prayer frustration) to the Mother of God

What to pray you to ask you? You see all you see, you know myself, look into my soul and give her what she needs. You, everything has undergone, premier, - you will understand everything. You made the baby in the manger and taking it with your own hands from the cross, you alone you know all the height of joy, all grims. You, who entered the adoption of the whole human genus, look at me with maternal concern. From the Tenet Sin, bring me to my son. I see a tear, irrigated your face. It is necessary for me, you shed EE and let her shout traces of my limits. So I came, I'm standing, I'm waiting for your response, oh, Mother of God, Oh, Four, Oh, Vladychitsa! I do not ask anything, just stand before you. Only the heart of ME, the poor human heart, exhausted in the longing of the truth, throwing your own legs, Vladychyza! Give everyone who calls you, to reach the eternal day and the face to worship you.